So now what?

Fast forward a few years, now divorced, a single mom and still waiting for that perfect someone to sweep me off my feet. I had become the topic of many friends’ discussions.

“Isn’t there anyone we can introduce you to?”
“Have you tried online dating?”
“Being single is better, trust me!”

I always loved the last comment because it generally came from the happiest of couples, who, for all their complaints about one another, still spend copious amounts of time being all lovey dovey. It is easy to say “stay single” when you know that there is someone waiting for you at the end of the day.

But the best comment from loved ones was, “You are at your sexual peak! Go out, have fun! It’s all down hill after this!”

So there I was, past my “peak”. What a waste! In my haste of wanting out of the marriage, I really hadn't given it enough thought. I was 33, divorced, two small children, in the process of building my career…who had time for fun, let alone a relationship. To say that I was frustrated was a complete and utter understatement! I began to frantically search for someone to fill the spot next to me, looking for that perfect blend of Hugh Jackman and Ward Cleaver.

  

I never did find it.

I can tell you what I did find...I found the unemployed, still living with mama, wanna be Fonz; the sweet but desperate magazine photographer who promised I would have an amazing life with him; the incredibly hot Balkan god; the preppy boy who still wasn’t over his true love; the law enforcement officer who couldn’t make up his mind between being happy or miserable (that one scared me…volatile emotions and a gun, not a good combo!); the latin lover who said I didn’t have enough meat on my ass for his liking (that’s a good thing in my eyes!); the young stud who tried to convince me that age didn’t matter – in his country; and the pseudo intellect who thought opening a door was the extent of what being a gentleman was all about.

You name it, I found it.

So what was I supposed to do? I had hit my peak...all the books and articles said sex would never be as great as it would be now. Yet I was alone.
 

What had I done?